broken hearts.

It seems like there’s been a lot of broken hearts lately. One of them is mine included. My friend fell for this one girl over the summer, and was completely thrown away by her when school started. I heard from another friend that one of our mutual friends was dumped by his girlfriend because she wasn’t ready for a relationship, but a month later he found her with a new boyfriend. My close friend was dumped by my best friend a year ago, and he just recently got over her – but then he saw something that made him upset again. There have also been a couple of deaths lately – those still count as broken hearts. They break the hearts of those who loved them, because the loss that they feel provokes a sort of emptiness in their hearts that can never be replaced.

You know, a heart is so fragile, anything can break it. It’s not just from a breakup or being rejected, or being cheated on. It might be something as simple as having your pet die, feeling like there’s no one there for you, or hearing your friend says something that you’d never thought they would say about you. That’s how easily our heart breaks, and that’s how easily we cry. And lately, my heart’s been breaking a lot. Not just from my ex-boyfriend, but from my friends as well. When I argue with them, my heart breaks over and over again; because it makes me upset that I can’t say anything right. It always feels like everything or anything I say will hurt someone, or cause someone to disagree with me. It feels as though I should just shut my mouth forever, because no one really wants to hear what I say anyways. I should just stay invisible and unheard, because it causes an argument when I speak.

When I tell my friends I feel as though my life is falling apart right now, it’s not that they don’t understand, but it’s because it’s hard for them to sympathize I guess. To them, it must seem like my life is going pretty well, and it’s a lot better than theirs. But fact is, that’s because we as human beings are so concentrated on ourselves, that we tend to think our own lives are the worst, and others can’t even begin to compare to ours. That’s the thought I always keep in mind though. That’s why I’ve learned to not complain, because there’s always someone out there with worse problems than my own. How can I bother other people with my problems and complain about them when there are children out there dying of starvation and fighting in wars at the mere ages of 5 years old? My life is nothing compared to theirs. I’m a nobody in this world.

That’s why I can only talk about my problems on this blog. Here is where I can complain without any worries, because I’m basically complaining to no one. That way, I’m not trying to compare my own life to others, because there’s no one there to listen.